so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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