before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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