he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
