I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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