found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
