shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
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