Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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