guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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