I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
