i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
