I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
