I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Randomize
