4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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