i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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