What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
