saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
he high fived his dick after we had sex
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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