i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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