dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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