tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize