Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
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