summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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