if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
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