my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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