you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
