Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
you told grandpa to call you daddy
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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