I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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