R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize