he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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