I seem to have left my pride at pride
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
