Need sex. Gaining weight.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Randomize