I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I just googled if crying burns calories
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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