White coat. Heels.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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