i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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