my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
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