I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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