This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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