just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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