Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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