yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
