I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
