my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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