Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Randomize