This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
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