Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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