Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
