This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Randomize
