Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
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