Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
