Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
The air was thick with penises
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
My ass is underappreciated
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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