Who did Billy Mays play for?
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize