Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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