Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
