what if every blade of grass was a penis?
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
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